I don’t have a middle name, but it could be “Buys-a-Lot”.

When my husband died several years ago, I laughed as I discovered he had bought so any paper towels that I wouldn’t have to replenish the supply for at least three years.

And now…

I find I am doing the same thing. Why? I could blame Sam’s Club and their large quantities. I could blame Amazon, too, for not being explicit in some product descriptions. I once needed a box of paperclips and ended up with 24 boxes. I didn’t have enough needy friends to give away all those clips.

And then again, maybe it’s my memory. I forget where I store some things and when I go to use the “last” tube. of toothpaste, for example, I think I need more. I go to Sam’s club — buy 12 tubes so I won’t run out soon again, come home and suddenly find I already had 16 tubes stored in the laundry room. The “s” word comes to mind.

I also. occasionally order “auto-ship” products on one of the shopping channels, decide I’m not crazy about the product but forget I ordered “Auto-ship; and get another shipment, keep it, forget again, get another shipment and THEN decide to cancel auto-ship. I am a regular donor to Salvation Army.

OR I do like the product but don’t use it as frequently as the manufacturer suggests. The auto-ship products arrive and stack up…until I wake up and delay a shipment or two or three. I ordered big bags of dog food on auto-ship and suddenly had so much dog food I almost had to adopt two more dogs.

Or with the coffee k-cups I was down to the last k-cups in the box and quick went to Amazon to order another big box. A day later another box showed up. I guess I was on auto-ship, all the time and didn’t realize it. Wanna stop by for a cup of coffee? I have plenty.

I hadn’t had a cold for quite a while, though the sniffles just arrived. During my last cold I ran out of Kleenex. Ever since then I have been buying Kleenex, I have enough for the sniffles and for years to come. My late husband would be cheering.

And yes, I have a lot of paper towels and toilet paper, too. During early Covid, when everyone was buying toilet paper I had plenty. However when I went to CVS and saw they had gotten in a big shipment of toilet paper, guess what? I bought more.

I sometimes wonder just who will be the person who visits my home after I die and sees everything I own. They will wonder about me. Why all the Kleenex; did she stuff her bra with them? She must’ve drunk LOTS of coffee; yet she took naps.. And how many times of day did she brush her teeth?

Well, I don’t over-indulge with alcohol and I’m pretty good to my dogs. So I’m not so bad…just forgetful. I’m rather glad I don’t have children, however. When they would visit they, too, would wonder if their mother was getting a bit dotty. On the other hand, they could also pack their bags with lots of Kleenex, toilet paper, paper towels and toothpaste for the ride home.

Problem is: I’d probably buy more.